addy.hagen's.blog



Wednesday, September 8, 2010

...can't...sleep...

5:50am.
That is what time the pretty little green microwave numbers indicate as I finally start writing this first post of my adventure. I just started the coffee pot because with all of the thoughts rolling through my head, I don't think I am going to go back to sleep like I once planned. These thoughts have in fact had me up since about 4:50am.... it only took about 30 minutes of tossing and turning in my bed before I decided to just give up on the extra sleep and start on my blog because I have been putting it off for the last couple of months. The last 30 or so minutes have been formatting and changing the title and picture and information of my blog and blogger profile, eating cereal, and letting Marco and Dilly (parents' cats) in and out of the back door. Now I sit down (after even more procrastination) and attempt to feel at least a little bit productive this morning. More than anything, I am really trying to use this blog as a coping mechanism right now for the anxiety that has steadily increased the last few days as unexpected events toss my plans all over the place. If you had the chance to talk with me about a week ago, I probably said something along the lines of: "Ya, I'm feeling pretty good about being ready to move to Arkansas for a year. I am really taking the time to work on what I need to get done and I am feeling pretty organized." Now I am kicking myself for once again believing everything would go so smooth.
Although it is true that life has gotten pretty hectic the last couple of days and I continue to realize the things I haven't finished, I think about all the experiences I have had the past year, all the wonderful people that I have had the pleasure of getting to know, and the time I have had with my family. And of course, I make myself think about all the things I did accomplish. What I am even more excited for though is the chance to start more projects and meet even more wonderful people.
I am ready to continue sharing my passion for helping children, and I am ready to continue meeting and working with people that share my passions and can spark in me new passions as well.
So even though my crazy thoughts have gotten me up at this hour, I sit here writing this post feeling oddly content because I know tomorrow morning about this same time I will be hopping in the car off to my new adventure.
6:53am.
Lordy, I hope I get better at this whole posting a blog thing. A flippin hour to write that much...yar.